ADVANCED MUGGLE STUDIES

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Ch. 7: Ottaline Gambol is the boggart’s boggart

This week, we discuss: Malfoy’s glittering future soccer career; tiny boners and skinned shrivelfigs; dreary shipping; HOLD THE FUCKING PHONE WE FOUND OTTALINE GAMBOL; who needs academic excellence?; arguing pedagogy with Snape and Lupin; foreshadowing Umbridge; the utter uselessness of waddiwasi; nobody wants to sit with Snape; pookas, boggarts, and tiny moist hands; the lasting…

Fantastic Beasts Trailer 2: We asked the Mirror of Erised, and it showed us Brachiobendo!!

The second major trailer for Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them: The Crimes of Grindelwald dropped at San Diego Comic-Con, so of course we dropped everything to discuss our love of Newt and the never-ending Deppwreck. (And in the process, solved one of the more ridiculous mysteries that has haunted us since Cursed Child!)…

Droid Please: Solo! #itsfine

Come join our post-Solo discussion! All the spoilers ahead. We discuss all aspects of the film, and discover the true guiding ethos behind the creation of this film. #whynot

Bonus Episode: The Crimes of Grindelwald Trailer

WE RETURN!! And just in time for the new trailer for Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them: The Crimes of Grindelwald. We’re equal parts vindicated, consternated, annoyed and intrigued, so join us for our breakdown! Also, if you’d like to watch the trailer for yourself, check it out here. Advanced Muggle Studies is not responsible for any…

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Ch. 10: Monologuing or it didn’t happen

This week, we discuss: whether or not God has a penis and why he’s into circumcision; Jesus the perfect party guest; let’s all seduce Oliver Wood; teen embarrassment and legit reasons to be depressed; please boss us around, Emma Watson; flavorful souls and tasty Muggles; dementors are functioning alcoholics; the Ministry is made of stupid; Sirius’s muscles are made of no freaking way; without…

Droid, Please! Episode 1: The Last Jedi

Your Professors don their Jedi Master robes for our first official episode of Droid, Please!, our running Star Wars project. And what better place to start than with an exhaustive (not really) discussion of the latest Star Wars installment, Episode VIII: The Last Jedi? We couldn’t think of a better place, either. Discussion Part 1:…

Bonus Episode: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them: The Crimes of Grindelwald

Your professors speculate wildly about the latest info revealed for Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them: The Crimes Of Grindelwald. Join us as we discuss: costuming, body language, the controversial casting of Johnny Depp, Theseus Scamander and Leta Lestrange, Jude Law as Dumbledore, Credence’s fate and what we want most from this movie! …

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Chapter 9: 394 Shades of Hinkypunk Hanky-Panky

This week, we discuss: life as a background Everyone Else at Hogwarts; insensitive Cher songs; trying to figure out how Head Boy and Girl work; hillbilly high school; inter-House hanky-panky and Percy the Boner-Killer; how portraits work; Dumbledore is not having any of it; Percy’s tragic handicap; cowardly portrait guardians; the world is ending so let’s play…

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Ch. 8: Kappa Dat Ass Up

This week, we discuss: supervillain Draco; murderous, malevolent goblins; that’s not how teeth or lead work; abnormally polite rapist monsters; soul-seeking among the bowels; big butts and soul power; stanning for drunk Trelawney; flobberworms; manic Oliver Wood; unfailingly on-point Ron; WE LOVE CROOKSHANKS; Hermione’s inability to back down and Harry’s inability to step up; good Harry hair; Percysplaining; wizards hate social structures; the unexpectedness of honest adults; smoking goblets and buried hatchets; multicolored…

Bonus Episode: The Last Jedi trailer

It’s a bit late, but the Professors know that any time is a good time for Star Wars! We discuss the trailer for The Last Jedi and discuss all our theories and spoilers.

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Ch. 6: Horoscopes and hippogriffs know no personal boundaries

This week we discuss: awesome alliteration; pretty pug Pansy Parkinson; how exactly Hermione planned to pull this off; academic excellence despite physics; emotional labor with Ron/Hermione and Harry/Ginny; large schools hate signs; Sir Cadogan and King Pellinore; Divination is clearly the worst to come; tasseography, apophenia and pareidolia; Helena Blavatsky and the paradox of Seers; Neville and the Macbeth effect; Hermione has no patience for this…

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Ch. 5: Just keep the eldritch horrors out of my backyard, thanks

This week we discuss: inappropriate Weasleys; Hermione & Ginny 4LYFE; the fact that Hermione clearly has WAY more friends than either of the boys; putting up with bad male behavior; mansplaining with Percy Weasley; Arthur Weasley, Ministry rebel; real live adult supervision; Hermione-Sherlock fanfic; misdirection with Sneakoscopes and Scabbers; R.J. Lupin; Crookshanks knows what’s up; the fictional “driver”; weak Malfoy burns; no one in this book remembers they have…